Ha.
I had always joked that I would play Another One Bites the Dust at my wedding. Now I have to play it at my funeral instead. You see, my wedding featured more traditional wedding music instead... More traditional wedding music, a little chapel,an ivory dress, flowers...
A klingon...
You thought I was kidding didn't you? Of course I would have a Klingon at my wedding. A Klingon and a Ferengi. A Klingon, a Ferengi, and a Borg... And the reception was at a star port... and my cake featured a Star Trek logo... And the night before I drank something called a "Warp Core Breach" and the rest of the night is a foggy blur, except that I ended up wearing a tiara...
But it was fun.
Of course it was. It was my wedding, and it was everything I had ever wanted a wedding to be. My family was there. Friends were there. Michael's friends were there. Michael's mother still played the marytr and stayed away, but I didn't let that ruin the day. It was touching and memorable and sentimental, and I am deeply deeply in love with my husband. And I have been exceedingly cute about calling him my husband for the past week. I have to assume that eventually this state of newlywed euphoria will wear off, but for the time being it is nice to be cute. And I am not cute.
I originally set out to write about some truly tacky people who decided that our bachelor/bachelorette party wasn't crazy enough for them so they left (after about 20 minutes) to find strippers of their own and have the party the way they felt it should be... Without the bride or groom to be, and acted like we were the bad ones because my BLIND husband didn't want a stipper he couldn't see or that his gay best man couldn't enjoy... and because I don't want some strange man's sweaty balls shoved in my face... Because of that we weren't having a real party, so it was OK to leave. Even though these were my so-called friends and my brother/man of honor... although later on he did apologize and I was able to forgive him.. which is good, because I hate being mad at my brother. The rest of the tacky crowd, however, really hurt my feelings, and had it not been for a few key people, would have completely ruined my night. I have decided, after much soul searching and discussion both with my new husband and others, that they were tacky, that they were wrong, and that I shouldn't waste any more energy on them. Consider the matter dropped.
In fact, it was dropped earlier in the week. I decided that my time was better spent with better people. The only reason I mention the others in this post at all is to better highlight how truly awesome the others at the party and at the wedding were.
So the stripper-seekers (male and female) will remain nameless. (Except my brother, but he did, again, apologize sincerely... So he's OK.) The other's however, deserve mentioning.
First of all, I got to meet Michael's best friend, John, for the very first time in my life. John was an awesome man. I knew I would love him when he knocked on the door to our room, and after Micheal opened it, I didn't hear anything for a few minutes. When I peeked over, they were hugging like long lost brothers. Then John hugged me, and I have to tell you, I immediately trusted him and felt like I had known him forever. He was so warm and open and wonderful. I have never met anyone as honest as he was, right off the bat. He was also protective of Michael, which I loved immediately, because I feel protective of Michael as well. He was so open, infact, that everyone else loved him immediately too. John is going to go down as one of my favorite people ever.
Another one of my favorite people is Amy. Again, Amy is a friend of Michael's from Boulder. She wore a Star Trek Jersey to the wedding which I loved. She engaged everyone in conversation, regardless of who they were. And best of all, she came to my room a couple of hours before the wedding to help me get ready and to help me calm down. She even pressed my dress, helped me put on my shoes when I was shaking so badly I couldn't keep the buckle in my hand, and told me that I was beautiful after my dress was on, and the make up was done and my hair was combed out. Those were all things that my mother should have done, but didn't. These were all things that my brother, god bless him, tried to do, but really couldn't. These were things that I really needed a woman for, and because of Amy, I had one. I told Michael after the wedding was over, that I was going to steal her as my friend now. She was awesome. I hope she reads this and knows it. She saved the day in more ways than she could possibly know.
And then there was Jamie and Bob. Two more of Michael's friends. He refers to Jamie as his adopted little sister, and until I met her, I didn't really understand what he meant. Jamie and her husband Bob were great. Without ever having met me, she was willing to photograph the wedding. And I am a picky beeatch when photos are concerned (especially photos of me... witness my photo to the right. Self-portrait). The few that she has had a chance to send are awesome. I couldn't have done a better job myself. And she worked HARD. I know. I have photographed a number of weddings on my own. She worked hard for no pay and didn't complain. And got along with everyone. And Bob was too cool. I have never really met people like them before. I am glad I got to meet them now. I hope we can keep in touch.
Then there were the Bramlets. Heidi, one of my best friends from High School, and her husband Henry, someone I have known since High School... We had lost touch. Things happen, some good, some bad, mostly indifferent, and we lost touch. Aside from the occasional email, and a once a year (maybe) brief contact at a party, we never really talked. Then when I got engaged, my brother spilled the beans before I had a chance to announce it myself and I got a call from a very excited Heidi. So, I invited her and Henry to the wedding. I am so glad that I did. When they got to the bar at the hotel, it was immediately apparent that they were not only happy for us, but that the whole reason they came to Las Vegas was to celebrate with us. They came in, connected with Michael's friends, opened themselves up and were universally loved by everyone there. In fact, I think they may have made friends on their own that weekend. Heidi and I talked almost all night and cried and laughed and talked. They bought me a tiara. They picked up the tab (even for the deadbeats who left the party early two nights in a row)... They showed support. They showed love. They showed a decency that few possess. Getting a chance to reconnect with them made the weekend that much more special.
And then there was Kramies and Rene. Kramies is a musician friend of Michael's. I have to be honest. When I first saw them at the chapel, I didn't think that they could possibly be with our group. They were too cool... When I said that Kramies is a musician, I meant it. He looks like he belongs on an album cover, and Rene looked like a model. And they were the coolest people I had ever met. And some of the nicest. And for a talented guy, Kramies is very modest. Which I found refreshing.
And Christina - another one of my very best friends - came out, despite the fact that she may or may not have a ride back to LA... she came anyway. And Esther and Collin came, even though they are preparing for their own wedding in June, and Esther is trying to finish up Med School. They could only stay for the day, but seeing them was awesome. And they were genuinely happy to be there.
Heck, even my 82 year old grandmother seemed happy for us. And I have seen this woman four times in my life...
So, after a lot of thinking, and a fair amount of talking, and a lot of questioning, I have decided that I don't need to waste my time on dour, depressed people who want to make others as miserable as they clearly are. Some people really needed to grow up, and realize that the point of the weekend was celebration. I found the love of my life, which I never thought would happen. I am happier than I have ever been. I wanted everyone to have a great time and to celebrate that feeling of love and togetherness with us. Most people got into the spirit. A few bad eggs could not. They are the ones who missed out.
Henry said one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard on Saturday after the wedding as Michael and I were saying our good-byes... He said (paraphrased, but the sentiment is the same...)"The greatest gift we give is the friendship we bring to the table." That is so true. New friendships were forged that weekend. Michael and I said our vows infront of a room full of people who love us. I sometimes get this dark feeling that no one is there for me. This weekend proved me so very wrong. I am so blessed to have friends like I have, to have Michael, and to have gotten to know his friends. I would like to expand on Henry's thought. The greatest gift we give is not only the friendship we bring, but the openness of our hearts to our friends both new and old. The greatest gift is the ability to love and recognize that love in others.
I hope everyone keeps in touch. I hope I can hold on to this feeling forever. I hope the sour-puss crowd who couldn't join the fun at our wedding finally do grow up and realize that we should turn our attention toward a future forged in hope and we should not dwell on negativity.
So, from a newly married woman, to those friends I have had for a lifetime, and to the friends I made this last weekend and to the friends I haven't met yet, have a wonderful night. Dream pleasant dreams, and may you wake up with hope in the morning that carries you through to the night.
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